CoffeeShop of the Week: Dutch Flowers

   Located right off the Singel Canal by the Spui, this coffeeshop will provide you with decent product in a cool atmosphere. With that being said the guy working there has major issues. More on that to come.   

   As you walk in you will immediately notice that all of the shelves, picture frames and clocks on the walls are slanted. The visual effects are trippy while getting laced with some good hash from this tourists wonderland. A decently sized shop with plenty of seats for a room full of smokers. Try the Nepalese Temple Balls or something Moroccan.

   I have entered this shop numerous times in my Amsterdam travels and my last time in this shop will be unfortunately my last. It seems that the douche working behind the counter has a broken glass bong up the ass cause he causes problems daily. Having to work with the worlds finest hash and marijuana can’t be that bad could it? Dealing with negative vibes from that isn’t worth coming back, try Tweede Kamer or Dampring. Overall I give this place a 5 out of 10. Decent product, cool shop, but not worth the attitude. Blow Me Dutch Flowers!

When in Doubt, Pee Outside

   Walking into yet another coffeeshop I sense the urge to relieve myself, man I’ve got to pee real bad. Shit! The bathroom is occupied. “I’ll go when we leave,” I chuckle to myself, remembering how I am so good-looking and humorous.  ”I’ll have a gram of Lavender and a cappuccino,” I say. Why not really stuff my bladder full of liquid before I urinate. Rolling up that big fatty makes my mouth water, and I am sweating with delight as I rip off the glue. Sparking it up, the thought of having to pee quickly looses it way to the back of my brain. By the time I finish the joint, shit I can’t remember nothing. Scrambling to collect all my things  we head to the door. Walking right past the empty bathroom I don’t even think twice. Five minutes later something hits me like a ton of bricks, the urge is back… time to drain the main drain… I hate it when people say that.

   I could pop into a restaurant, coffeeshop, hotel? Pay .50 cents at McDonald’s, that’s expensive… And when you are about to give up and just pee against a wall you spot it. Could it be? Yes it is! A Giant green outdoor pisser.  

   Conveniently located throughout the city center by some canal corners you will spot these large, green, metal urinals. For all the men out there feel free to step right up, whip it out and have fun pissing on a piece of metal. The smell couldn’t be worse. Weeks of built up piss lingering since the last rain that washed it away. But… when you got to go, you got to go.

Take a Tram in The Dam!

   Walking through Amsterdam’s city centre, you will quickly find yourself dodging two fast-moving objects, bicycles and trams. Where do these trams go? How and where do you board them? How much are they and where do I purchase tickets? All great questions, and luckily you have the fun guide to help you through this mess.

   The first thing that you need to know about riding the trams in Amsterdam is that you will want to purchase a OV- Chipkaart.  This is similar to an atm card which can be loaded with prepurchased fare. The OV-Chipkaart will cost you 7.50 euros each card, will last for five years and will save you cash in the long run. With the Chipkaart base fares are .79 cents euro and will charge another .10 cent per kilometer. The card can be purchased just across from Central Station. http://www.gvb.nl/english/travellers/touristguide/english/Pages/Wheretobuy.aspx

   The Trams are easily accessible and will take you from the city center to the outskirts of the city. The trams rum from about 6am through just after midnight but check the schedule before you head out to make sure you will have a tram back. Take a look at the map and tram it up to somewhere new. http://www.gvb.nl/english/travellers/maps/Pages/Maps.aspx

CoffeeShop Of The Week: Katsu

   If you’re looking for an old school type of shop filled with a good mix of locals, tourists, and top shelf marijuana, then track down Katsu. Located around the corner from Albert Cuyp Market in The Old South you will find these locals hanging out offering top shelf marijuana at reasonable prices. A locals hang out with a cool down to earth vibe, you are likely to strike up a good conversation with an old school stoner that might teach you something.

   Recently I stopped by Katsu for some good smoke and to get a few puffs of the De Verdamper. This is a state of the art vaporizer using water as an additional filter. The taste along with the high from the De Verdamper is second to none and has started an intense debate alongside the Volcano. I smoked a nice Big Buddha Cheese mixed with some hash and felt the high almost immediately. Soon enough I was chatted up by some older local stoner. Each had shared their own stoner stories and we shared laughs. Bowl after bowl was smoked until I felt my head floating away from my body. This was a unique high for me unlike one I had ever come across. As I stood for the first time the rush of blood to my head felt as if my lights had been turned off. For those of you looking to get blitzkrieg, this is for you son. http://www.de-verdamper.nl/uk 

   Go to Katsu for decent deals on the gear and a great way to smoke the products. Overall I will give Katsu a 7 out of 10. Good weed and prices and cozy shop. Owner seemed nice enough. Check it out.

Tips About ATM’s and Accessing Money

 

   For most of us, converting our dollars and pounds in euros is somewhat costly and can be confusing to rookie travelers and stupid people. Do I bring my country’s currency with me and exchange it in Amsterdam? Do I purchase traveler’s checks? Will their ATM’s take my card? Listen people, welcome to the god damn 21st century. Accessing your money in Amsterdam is no different then from home. Here are a few tips to get you easy access.

   Amsterdam is filled with banks all over the city center that will have no issue taking your Visa or MasterCard logoed ATM card and giving you access to your own money for fees up the ass. Be prepared to pay at least a 1% transaction fee on top of something like  a $6.00 ATM fee. Frustratingly enough, this is the best option. Another option may include bringing dollars or pounds and exchanging them at currency exchanges. This is not a wise choice unless you are willing to take one in the can. Avoid accessing money at night. From time to time a card is known to get stuck in the machine. When this happens after hours, there is likely no way you will get this card back again. Amsterdam is not a lot of fun when broke and starving without gear to smoke.

   Be prepared to rack up bank fees while traveling overseas. This is bound to happen and unlikely you will avoid them. Use common sense and you should be fine.

CoffeeShop of The Week: Noon

                                                                    This week I give to you a shop close to Leidseplein Square that is known for it’s quality product and at a good value. Let’s face it, sometimes paying top shelf prices can be a drag man, that’s why I like Coffeeshop Noon. This shop, located at  Zieseniskade 22, is known for having a great deal on Blueberry. For a cool 26 euros you can have yourself a fat 4 gram nug of some sticky goodness. Blueberry is 80% sativa cross. The name itself is referring to the fruity flavor and the blue-tinted leaves. The Noon received high recognition in 2000, winning the Cannabis Cup for the Blueberry.  

   When you walk into Noon for the first time you will immediately notice how tiny the shop is. There is limited seating and if there are even a few groups in the shop, you are likely to not be able to sit down. Some may claim that Noon is a locals only type of place but I would disagree, feel free to stay and smoke if you’d like. Mostly I come to this shop for the house special and then I bounce out of there. I also have heard mixed reviews about the house special Blueberry, and in my experience this is true. I have stopped by at the shop and been very happy to see big fat juicy nugz of Blueberry. Buds that are sticky and taste so good in a joint. You feel a sense of satisfaction knowing that you received a great deal and that you have the gear for the day at your disposal. I have also been there at a moment when it seemed that the good stuff was gone and that these little leftover shwaggy pieces was all that was left. I guess I was late to the party?

   As you can see there is somewhat mixed feelings about this shop and that is somewhat deserved. It is worth a stop in to see if the Blueberry looks good. If you don’t think that it is worth the value than I suggest the S-5. Overall I give Coffeeshop Noon 6 out of 10. Go for the Blueberry and keep it moving.

What to expect when landing at AMS

   Once touching down, after what is likely a grueling trek across the Atlantic, you are now lucky enough to go through the normal airport customs and baggage experience. For most of us, customs is a breeze. For some, the idea of having to answer to the fuzz about all your hidden secrets might not be your idea of a good start to a vacation. Once you have exited customs and received your baggage you now have options. One option that you might opt for is the cab service. This is an expensive option. A cab from the airport to the city center can take as little as 15 minutes in the early morning, but this cab fare might be a s high as 30-40 euros. That is a lot of money that can instead be spent on world-class marijuana and whores.  However the cabs are very clean and luxurious as far as a standard cab is concerned. Vans will also be lined up for small groups or obese Americans.

   Another option would be taking the train from the airport to Central Station. Upon exiting the customs and baggage terminal you will walk through a series of typical airport retailers, then you will come upon the train terminal.  You don’t have to look hard it is easy to see. You can easily purchase tickets at a vending machine to avoid incompetent tourists and a more expensive ticket. Tickets for a one way tickets to Central Station will run you 3.50 euros. Trains depart 6 times an hour from 6am – 1am. The train trip is about 15-20 minutes.

   Once you arrive at Central Station and you have exited the station you once again have many options. Feel free to walk, take a cab or the tram to your hotel or other destination. Enjoy your time in the Dam for it is sure to fly by!